I have a crush on someone today.

Early in the morning...in the class...i saw her well i feel sumthing different bout her.Is it her hair or her smile......heck i dunnoe....she bit remind of other her........maybe tat......gloomy me....

I still the sucker she wan me to be.....

Well April 2nd is near....sucks....i had to motiviated myself to concencrate.today i saw her pics.wao it crush me tat i miss her smile so badly.hear her voice again.......life sucks.Confucious is right be happy wit the girl u have rather than the girl u dun have.Bleeding in live....well no such thing.April 2nd i begin to hate it.If i only to be brave n confidence wit myself,no use to talk bout the past.Life is a journey not a destination a lot things for me to learn.In the end she treat me like this, i realize i learn about feelings.In the future we shall meet again if fate smile upon me.

Leona Lewis

Heck i have a small crush wit leona lewis....plus beyonce n tyra banks.....plus i attracted to african tall women.they muz have sumthing.A porsche cayman.johnanthan dude no money la if got i wont come to study help.i will be in singapore chilling.........today my econs class there sum fucker indian ...bloody bastard go die better.......so annoying n like to show off.He juz make a fool of himself in stats...by showing off in copying wat carmen said.Useless la.Leona Lewis...well if i going uk i might have a chance.Try to ask kim out...seem this weekend she have a date.U guys muz noe who liao.i bet 100 bucks is tat guy.I try to imagine...cant be kut.

Phew

I had dropped my physics like on last friday.Wao i feel stress free.Physics sound heavy.....i got enough to concencrate on my econs for now.My result juz released yesterday not so good.Quite dissapointed wit econs.I dunnoe which idiot say ez....ur language muz be strong...i guess they dun understand wat i wrote.Bloody cocky brits examiners!

Last friday oh ya there is a charity auction going on...it quite.Its kinda tat A52 batch quite motivated n outspoken...not bad.A lot of lengluis too....ciz i wan to bet a leng lui some guy straight away 100 bucks.Muz be lonely despreate for one. Oh god...i saw one catch my eye......she tall sophiscated and i can tell she like blacks.I love woman who love black......still wao look at me...i didn't have a porsche or a beamer.....i hope my mum approve a 30 thousand beamer.Not bad......but in the end i wish to see tat someone again to smile at me n say goodbye.Kinda miss her but not strong as the feeling slowly faded.I dun understand why she can be friends wit me anymore....haiz i am a sucker.

My aunt going to move soon.The house is going leave to me alone or maybe wit my cousin.Anyway wao a huge responsiblities.Australia study there hmmm????i hope not monaash.Mel uni surfing at the beach everyday wit a rented house at st kilda beach not bad.Far from uni.I not sure my choices...uk too exp...i hope reccession prolong causing pound to be more deappreciated......well i better get back to gym now.If u guys wan gym call me i give free one day trial for fitness first.I better get fit from prom>i hope my mum give me a lot cash for suits n cars.

13th Febuary

No wonder i feel so gloomy yesterday.....it was 13th Feb.Onli some of u understand why 13th Feb n those some of u noe why 16th feb maybe suckiest day of my life.......haih...valentine day...love in the air.....today is my cousin, Arafat birthday...Happy brithday man......i miss someone so badly but i still dun understand WHY?....why i still got mixed feeling....i try to see another ppl still......u still there......is it my curse?Had karma get back on me?I think too far.

I have insomania lately.....i cant stop..........why?i try think another stuff...still u r there.Who r u?wat r u?Y u into my life?I afraid i still like u after all tis while.But this feeling of like sucks!

Dude ,Mr pilot i noe u still lover her...dun be a phony by saying spread rumours u dun like her.U talk cock to us onli...dun annoyed me...mr pilot...for ur action tell us who r u....u noe wat...wat can win her heart honesty...u too fake tat y she can see u.I pity u.

14th Feb a long day for me......well i better get going to buy my cousin present then.chow

I have touch reality finally.

When i finally touch reality....by then the sun already set at the mountain........so it all true....still day dreaming am i?

I truly live the past forever....for i fear reality.........i see the it wit my own eyes.....ur words......ur expression.Hmmmm....well i can see through the lies......i dunnoe wat it is.....she make me helpless as child......wat power she had.

All men weak coz of women.

Lies......human nature..........well there always her eyes show sumthing different......women like her...bah....open ur eyes n see the world.

Reality...i wan to do sumthing better wit my life.....the world well so big tat we can anyone in it yet so small unexpected coz i am still guessing.

I too inthoughtful....crappy...immature...my vices.

Nah i muz be the most selfish ppl in the world.So stingy weirdo i am......haih too self centre....why?i hardly notice ppl's needs.I too arrogant all the time.....haih.....i love to crap for no reason.

Too inthoughtful n insensitive.Of course i not the person u thought i were.......i dun believe u poor at analyst at ppl. I perhaps wellllllllll.......juz like some weirdo.......

I should touch reality more often face the truth rather than some dude staring at screen all day lifeless...................so sad....dunnoe myself sumtimes.

i should see some therapists for treatment perhaps.I'm too spoiled n pampered.Mean sarcastic person i am................haiz too much vices.