My Alibi

Frustration

2008-12-10T23:16:00.000-08:00

Well, those who close with me will understand what dilemma that i facing now.
I feel weak for once and unsecure bout the future. I hit myself that back to reality. I seriously to make magic happen again. I had to be desprate, risk-taker and fiecre if i want to secure myself. I don't believe it why good things always follow by bad things. Guess my past life owe him a lot. I would rather go there but how i going to cope when i am there. Follow my uncle's bold move perhaps? Too bold, for his time is different. But i will fight to the end and Nth will stop, ur words of cowardice doesn't scare me. Still sumtimes i feel i muz realize reality but i will fight for my own destiny.

Get TAG!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2008-09-24T06:11:00.000-07:00

RULE #1 People who have been tagged must write their answers on their blogs and replace any question that they dislike with a new question formulated by themselves.
RULE #2 Tag 6 people to do this quiz and those who are tagged cannot refuse.These people must state who they were tagged by and cannot tag the person whom they were tagged by continue this game by sending it to other people.

Tagged by Juting.

1. If your lover betrayed you, what will your reaction be?
* I would bring out my new lover hot sexier than her and make out in front of her. Tell my ex lover i bought her a new luggage and brought along her stuff. After that, i will say "we break up la, so here ur stuff and my farewell a big luggage, dun bother coming back i juz change the lock of "MY" apartment."

2. If you can have a dream to come true, what would it be?
* i am in a yacht just sailing out of Venice wit someone i love.

3. Will you change in attitude(or other things) to comfort your lover?
* See first, depends whether she is a bitch. Still i have many vices. Yup.

4. What would you do with a billion dollars?
* 50mil for scholarship fund. 200 mil for my own charity foundation of children future in third world countries. another 200mil for propeties around the world. Build business empire? Give parents 20mil.Bought a vineyard and roman villa. Beside my kids education.

5. Pretty but fat/Ungly but slim, which one would you prefer?
* Pretty fat la.Fat is now the trend. Skinny guys look gay la.

6. Which is more blessed, loving someone or being loved by someone?
* Being loved by someone is more blessed, feel being appreciated.

7. How long do you intend to wait for someone you really love?
* U think le...of course no la...mah like tat 50 years siao ar. I not tat emo and love in this real world don't last forever.

8. If the person you secretly like is already attached, what would you do?
* I will shakehand wit her bf and say apparently u r the best man.I hope i become better person next time.

9. If you like to act with someone, who will it be? your gf/bf or an actress/actor?
* wit Megan Fox in adult film la

10. Will you invite for Ex bf/gf to your wedding dinner?
* Ya, why not...frens mah.....got a lot of thing to catch up.

11. How would you see yourself in ten years time?
* Have his own investment firm, driving a M6 go back home. feel regret going back hom coz wife complain about my mum and my mum have a catfight wit my wife. Everybody hearing tehy complain each other.

12. What's your fear?
* i fear i disapointed everyone.

13. What kind of person do you think the person who tagged you is?
* funny, open minded, sophiscated, fashionable, finally a person u can talk about salvadore ferragamo or cool cars. good counsellor.

14. Would you rather be single and rich or married but poor?
* Single and rich, imagine old 50 years have a chick 20 years old. Still can bang man. U single uncommited and have all those family problems.

15. What's the first thing you do when you wake up?
* go pee, drink water and go back to sleep.

16. Would you give all in a relationship?
* Depends whether she a bitch or not. If she good, i surely will anything.

17. If you fall in love with two people simultaneously, who would you pick?
* why not take both? Sure both can understand.Double the cost better dun la, one who truely love me.

18. Would you forgive and forget no matter how horrible a thing the someone has done?
* dun step on my head second time.

19.Do you prefer being single or having a relationship?
* having relationship, have someone to talk about my problems and nvr feel lonely.

20.List 6 people to tag
* Kimberly Ho, Daniel Harris, Mr Lawrence, Wee Kiat, Sean, DQ

Glasses

2008-09-14T07:28:00.000-07:00

Ray-Ban Aviator Sunglasses damn cool. I loving it.Imagine wear a stripe suits lean on a bugatti veryon behind a private jet as background with sunset mood.Damn cool, but no money. Dream also useless.Its better set as a goal then, i have to work my ass off.Sorry butt for your suffering.

During my August break, I went to pelangi to change my old glasses.I saw the aviator sunglasses.550 above man, my mum is like going to faint if i wan to buy this.After that, i saw Aunty Ann wearing a ray ban aviator orange lense. 200 ringgit cheap compare to my dream one.when i try hers on, guess what my sis said, like apek in the sundry shop. Do i look that old????? Still, Aunty Ann say like a rock star sunglasses.But i look like an old man. SOB...SOB

Talking about changing glasses i have a new pair. Well u guys who know me surely know i wear a apek and nerdy frameless glasses.My mum asking me to change like my bro's full frame. Thinking about it, i want more mature and sophiscated glasses. So i ask the guy for hugo boss glasses. The guy is like wth, asking me " R u sure Hugo Boss?" My mum say like hear hugo boss, i wan to fall.Hugo Boss's glasses almost all the same style. Hugo boss truly boss.

End Up my mum not satisfied with hugo boss. She said i look like a old man. Oh god, she prefer espirit. I wonder is the looks or the price. A hugo boss cost about minimum RM 600.Still its very classy.Might as well take the espirit glasses, better than nothing away. Btter earn my own money. Unit trust?? anyone interested with me?

My style

2008-08-11T21:14:00.000-07:00

I Miss U so much.

2008-07-21T06:00:00.000-07:00

Hey Gramps.....it have been almost a month since i got the news bout ur surgery.When i got news, i thought u able to pull it throught like u always have.When i reached the hospital, i was shocked tat Aunty Tracy, Uncle Freddie and grandma was crying.I knew sumthing worse have came up.....when i gotta into the room.Seeing ur condition like tat, well i was shocked.I remember wat diease u ever get...u able to pull it throught.It seem tat my invicible gong gong succumb to death.Seeing my cousin, Arafat n my Aunty Julia in the room try to hold back the tears..i thought he have hopes left.When the doc declare he is brain death there no chance.......i was.....my only regrets is not able to spend more time wit u grandpa.Popo can't accept tat u r gone....so come to worst tat we have to pull the plug.Still i wish i able to talk to u at the last moment......At ur house in Alor Star, on ur death bed the last breath pain me in my memories.I dun wan to see u gone juz like tat.

I always thought u able to live for a long time due to ur good health.Well u go too fast for us to say goodbye.Guess this life...there always the unexpected.Some of ur frens came n dun believe tat u gone so fast.As u always smile...always strong n speak wit a strong manner.I won't forget wat u had taught me.I shall remember n i won't let u to be dissapointed.

Since back at KL, at Mandarin Oriental's ur favourite chinese res and ur favourite peking duck........its wont be the same without u.U always lecture the way my hair, my clothes n my lifestyle.Then i suddenly realized wat u mean.....now i understand wat made man remember or to appreciate its by deceisive event.

I can see in grandma's eyes how much tat she love u.How much tat u care bout the family n love it.When i lost u grandpa, i feel there no hero in my life.

Ballnight

2008-06-12T08:18:00.000-07:00

Ballnight is on 30th june....kl sentral hilton 130 per ticket.At least i believe my cousin's years is cheaper.Damn exp n hardly ppl going wrong time.....middle of our hol.well for me next uni degree?sucks.......miss all the chance...i need a car.My uncle lend me his z3 he bound to kick my ass........rent one...clothes????clothes well g2000 not bad.I kinda in dilemma to go or not?????

Watever....Scram

2008-06-12T08:13:00.000-07:00

Seeing my fren's feelings.Remind my foolish past....

i dunnoe why? ur smile is so pain?

Why?i try to approach as a fren.Nth in return

Who think u r? A bitch rite?

watever.....ur words r lies.

I have a crush on someone today.

2008-03-30T23:07:00.000-07:00

Early in the morning...in the class...i saw her well i feel sumthing different bout her.Is it her hair or her smile......heck i dunnoe....she bit remind of other her........maybe tat......gloomy me....

I still the sucker she wan me to be.....

2008-03-30T23:01:00.000-07:00

Well April 2nd is near....sucks....i had to motiviated myself to concencrate.today i saw her pics.wao it crush me tat i miss her smile so badly.hear her voice again.......life sucks.Confucious is right be happy wit the girl u have rather than the girl u dun have.Bleeding in live....well no such thing.April 2nd i begin to hate it.If i only to be brave n confidence wit myself,no use to talk bout the past.Life is a journey not a destination a lot things for me to learn.In the end she treat me like this, i realize i learn about feelings.In the future we shall meet again if fate smile upon me.

Leona Lewis

2008-03-19T01:57:00.000-07:00

Heck i have a small crush wit leona lewis....plus beyonce n tyra banks.....plus i attracted to african tall women.they muz have sumthing.A porsche cayman.johnanthan dude no money la if got i wont come to study help.i will be in singapore chilling.........today my econs class there sum fucker indian ...bloody bastard go die better.......so annoying n like to show off.He juz make a fool of himself in stats...by showing off in copying wat carmen said.Useless la.Leona Lewis...well if i going uk i might have a chance.Try to ask kim out...seem this weekend she have a date.U guys muz noe who liao.i bet 100 bucks is tat guy.I try to imagine...cant be kut.

Phew

2008-03-16T23:00:00.000-07:00

I had dropped my physics like on last friday.Wao i feel stress free.Physics sound heavy.....i got enough to concencrate on my econs for now.My result juz released yesterday not so good.Quite dissapointed wit econs.I dunnoe which idiot say ez....ur language muz be strong...i guess they dun understand wat i wrote.Bloody cocky brits examiners!

Last friday oh ya there is a charity auction going on...it quite.Its kinda tat A52 batch quite motivated n outspoken...not bad.A lot of lengluis too....ciz i wan to bet a leng lui some guy straight away 100 bucks.Muz be lonely despreate for one. Oh god...i saw one catch my eye......she tall sophiscated and i can tell she like blacks.I love woman who love black......still wao look at me...i didn't have a porsche or a beamer.....i hope my mum approve a 30 thousand beamer.Not bad......but in the end i wish to see tat someone again to smile at me n say goodbye.Kinda miss her but not strong as the feeling slowly faded.I dun understand why she can be friends wit me anymore....haiz i am a sucker.

My aunt going to move soon.The house is going leave to me alone or maybe wit my cousin.Anyway wao a huge responsiblities.Australia study there hmmm????i hope not monaash.Mel uni surfing at the beach everyday wit a rented house at st kilda beach not bad.Far from uni.I not sure my choices...uk too exp...i hope reccession prolong causing pound to be more deappreciated......well i better get back to gym now.If u guys wan gym call me i give free one day trial for fitness first.I better get fit from prom>i hope my mum give me a lot cash for suits n cars.

13th Febuary

2008-02-13T22:33:00.000-08:00

No wonder i feel so gloomy yesterday.....it was 13th Feb.Onli some of u understand why 13th Feb n those some of u noe why 16th feb maybe suckiest day of my life.......haih...valentine day...love in the air.....today is my cousin, Arafat birthday...Happy brithday man......i miss someone so badly but i still dun understand WHY?....why i still got mixed feeling....i try to see another ppl still......u still there......is it my curse?Had karma get back on me?I think too far.

I have insomania lately.....i cant stop..........why?i try think another stuff...still u r there.Who r u?wat r u?Y u into my life?I afraid i still like u after all tis while.But this feeling of like sucks!

Dude ,Mr pilot i noe u still lover her...dun be a phony by saying spread rumours u dun like her.U talk cock to us onli...dun annoyed me...mr pilot...for ur action tell us who r u....u noe wat...wat can win her heart honesty...u too fake tat y she can see u.I pity u.

14th Feb a long day for me......well i better get going to buy my cousin present then.chow

I have touch reality finally.

2008-02-08T11:01:00.000-08:00

When i finally touch reality....by then the sun already set at the mountain........so it all true....still day dreaming am i?

I truly live the past forever....for i fear reality.........i see the it wit my own eyes.....ur words......ur expression.Hmmmm....well i can see through the lies......i dunnoe wat it is.....she make me helpless as child......wat power she had.

All men weak coz of women.

Lies......human nature..........well there always her eyes show sumthing different......women like her...bah....open ur eyes n see the world.

Reality...i wan to do sumthing better wit my life.....the world well so big tat we can anyone in it yet so small unexpected coz i am still guessing.

I too inthoughtful....crappy...immature...my vices.

2008-02-01T07:12:00.000-08:00

Nah i muz be the most selfish ppl in the world.So stingy weirdo i am......haih too self centre....why?i hardly notice ppl's needs.I too arrogant all the time.....haih.....i love to crap for no reason.

Too inthoughtful n insensitive.Of course i not the person u thought i were.......i dun believe u poor at analyst at ppl. I perhaps wellllllllll.......juz like some weirdo.......

I should touch reality more often face the truth rather than some dude staring at screen all day lifeless...................so sad....dunnoe myself sumtimes.

i should see some therapists for treatment perhaps.I'm too spoiled n pampered.Mean sarcastic person i am................haiz too much vices.

" PINK ! "

2008-02-01T07:04:00.000-08:00

Pink maybe my new colour.I noe wat u think.....crappy henry try to be sensitive n gay rite now.

Pink is my new obsession.........pink is my new favourite colour..........pink is my new lover......pink is always my love........yet pink i love so much.

Starbucks brews $1 cup of coffee.

2008-01-26T05:55:00.001-08:00

I heard read this article from BBC about starbucks able to enter cheap coffee market.Wat the $^%$...wit 1 dollar coffee, they able to monopolize the market. It so american, i dun wish to go Italy or France at it small cafe sipping starbucks coffee.All this franchises destroy foundation of creative ideas of exotic delicious beverage n food.I assume malaysia cheapest starbucks will cost 3 or 4 sumthing after they added their cheapest to the menu.....oh god......sob..sob i going to miss my favourite cafes.They truly use the economics of scale by using purchasing power.Well kiss french n italian cafe good bye....i going to miss u guys. I wonder how they manage.....franchise restaurants n cafes rule the industry.NO way, where can.To be frank, starbucks is nth.Aus they prefer the small italian cafes.French n italian prefer their own.Not cheap or wat.We prefer ppl personal brew our coffee.I love the hot coffee smell in the morning...speaking of coffee...i have to go n drink...long time liao.I support genuine rather brand names.

Sweeney Todd The Demon Barber

2008-01-24T03:19:00.000-08:00

The movie is quite not i expected so much blood shed....cannibalism.Bloody bitch lie bout the wife's death.Should i cut to the ending...nah i dun wan to spoilt ur mood.The movie story kinda almost same The Novel " The Count of Monte Crisco" by Alexander Dumas.Almost the same.......its quite interesting the movie......tyhe ending is so sad.Well Felicia n Elaine will listen the song i going to sing everyday.Tat go wit ah seng...i noe he will kick my ass.Cum on i am waiting for u.

Today well my fren intro us to this girl.I like this kind girl's attitude.Kinda rock n roll attidude.I love rock n roll n from the jucebox baby..I noe someone will said oh my god here we go again......i like cocky n mean girls.i dunnoe why.I imagine in my married years.I will be the one wearing the apron wrote there papa kitchen.Come on u guys.......be the new age guys.

Ugly ppl blog

2008-01-14T00:33:00.000-08:00

Wao so fast 14 of jan.Wao next month is 14 Feb Valentine Day.Well i going solo wit blackie liao.My cousin birthday...oh well wat to give him huh?A shirt n wat kind shit wait til then onli decide.........I hearf fish going to Monaash.Media degree n psychology sumthing...ummm fish i dun understand why u always wan to change course?I thought u into business.

Nvm tat sucks la tomolo stats n then physics....oh god........about the girl i miss ...some of u thought is fish.Oh well u r wrong.The girl well onli few of the guys noe n one or two girls nia....hehe ........wat for i tell......Ah seng said hey not good looking but have good personalities.Come think of relationship....i dun like commitment.....i dun noe write wat crap else.

Oh No!!!Bloody $%#$%$%....Its here til 22nd jan......You going to miss me when i gone more like i going to miss u when i gone.

2008-01-10T23:31:00.000-08:00

External exam is here...so fast jan d....well i have my first two papers C1 & C2 maths.C1 maths quite complicated well C2 maths quite ez.Should study more on C1.....But anyway how i had to concencrate my next exam stats...continue bloody ohysics n econs n c3 maths.Oh god...three days streak remind me of SPM.I suddenly miss my school years.Oh well "let bygones be bygones"After the basic maths exam on wed nite, i back at my aunt's home.I watch this show called " boston legal",got this part about this immigrant n his son from Senegal try to find hope n dream in the land of oppurnity.Well His son got mugged n get shot n died....the dad try to charge the assailant but still assailant win the case.....Instead the dad saw this dude in his bus n take his own personal revenge by hitting this dude.Wow...in the end the dude charge the dad for hitting him.i was like thinking, if tat was my son who was shot by this MF, i would beat the crap out him....god sake...now we living in the world of evil always win......Weird wolrd..it so sad the father n son came to America for hope n dream of a better life..n his son get shot n get charge by court.Wow tat sucks.America the land oppurnity more like gang bang place.Africa god forsaking place ravage by war.......caused by greed n hatred.I saw this part of blood diamond in the history channel,this baby his feet get mutilated n crawling around the place.It sick n sad....why ????Should we kill our own brothers for diamonds tat use to trade wit the superpowers for more weapons.( i noe one of my dreams is to be professional arms dealer.)It shit to think bout it to kill for diamonds..in rwanda ppl get killed for being tat race.I saw this part ,this girl begging for mercy tat she wont be tutsi anymore coz she dun wan to be killed.Why we must kill ppl again for ?For wat ????Its shit anyway.

22nd exam ends....tat fast i going to 2nd Sem......I noe this world got a kind of ppl who like spy ppl for stupid reason.I noe tat very low n i think i maybe one of them....well i not tat sick......i dun understand why?go ahead... i dun care.Help Jan batch i cant keep my eyes closed for a sec, leng lui is everywhere.I noe tat sick.LOL.

Hey can us be friends again?I mean like juz tat small thing wit other guy is not concern bout ur matters.Juz tat its his attidude i bengang rite now.....I sumtimes tak boleh tahan da.Sorry if i do anything..i not heart broken n why should i?Juz frens k?

I so so dissapointed.First post of 2008.

2008-01-01T05:56:00.000-08:00

Seeing u well, i dun like the word " attraction",i am a fool to thinking tat i could love u.I heard u speak, see u in the wicked smile......well i so dissapointed.I miss the old u, i seeing things tat remind me of the old u...i sick coz i not okay, i so hurt.......tat nite the view so beautiful from here....i can't see u in it.It not rite tat make me realize tat wat can i do anymore. I feel emptyness again wit resentment.

Last nite, we have some great time....beer.Shit u turborg n carlsberg there one difference the price.Bloody hell,the dude recommend me some shit.I saw yong bin n they last nite. Some of ibrahims well r outgoing.....hard to find this species in the school.I going off on the 3rd.well so fast.to kl....oh god no car....i hope have a chance to ride the range rover.Cun Cun very beautiful.....well

I going to miss u guys....back to eddie n they all in kl liao.

Words come n go blew away by the wind,
For Time stopped for memories are forever,
Neither strong waves or the hottest sun,
shall i ever leave u guys alone to face the peril,
nay i shall stay for we happy band of brothers.( ermmm include some girls)

Lol last night....

2007-12-30T05:00:00.001-08:00

It great to see some frens last nite.I miss Sandeep.We used to bully him rite.Now he all grown up n has a gf.His gf quite good looking but 3 years younger.Coz home schooling.Not bad choice,from decent family....Sandeep is a lucky man.....He quite ok his looks if juz he gain few pounds.He will be very hot like his bro very good looking.Why i so gay suddenly talk bout guys looks.CK still the guy who always ready to go fight jungle warfare.Phisyarn still haven't give me my SLR yet.Joker.Somebody ask me is Fish there?i was like why always her la.No topic meh.lol true also.Surprisingly Sandeep took econs.He say quite ez but at the same time quite tough.Depend a person thinking.Unlike some egomaniac said tat econs is ez.If so, there so many bloody economist in P.H.D....LSE will be ez to get in.Bout tat, i forgot to ask Dan...oh god completely forgot bout him.Oh so tat Shen Yee i saw last nite quite cute in a way.Leverne quite ok.At last sp got some fashionable ppl.Unlike someone so bad taste.Leverne quite remind of me someone in kl.I kinda like her,u guys noe i like fiesty girls.

It sucks coz so long i still can see u.Cool, i n her juz frens.

2007-12-29T09:35:00.000-08:00

I tell u guys one thing.I n her still frens.Nth much.I so pissed off ppl always say like tat.Isn't tat obvious i n her r fren, pls grow up.If u very like tat person ,but u still can see her.Oh wao if sucks, coz u feel nth wit her.I now feel like she juz a desire.I hate ppl keep telling bout her.We juz frens.I tell u guys one thing.If a fren always take advantage, always thought himself highly arrogant, smart and lie ppl bout money, n i give so many chances to him.My patience already ran out.Wat for waste my time.Ppl r not stupid, u juz cheat ppl, ppl juz dun care u.Get it ,grow up n get a life.Have ur own self esteem not ego or serve ppl.I try to act cool of course is a good thing, cant be i still desperate for her.I dun like ppl stabbing my back, if u one to continue be my fren, pls be honest.I noe i very egomaniac person still i have self dignity.....i will love her still i think i n her juz frens.Better, i dun wan to waste my time.Wat for......i noe ur game girl.Missing u make me realize the more to life.Sam is rite wat for....we juz frens....i n her how to say in chinese we got faith, we will be together.I think nth...still my mum i will marry her sumthing like tat.My mum so old school...believe in one hit one go.I play first n when get married i find decent wife la.I have a lot of flaw... still a man always weak coz of a girl......ppl warn me bout her.which is correct, i respect them now.Wat for i clapped one hand n show off tat i do stuff for her , nth return...i see this girl in mid valley.ok i sick still i like this girl coz she my dream girl.Wat for i like her coz she not my dream girl.I think silly puppy love.I still immature....tat mid valley chick made me realize is tat girl from aus worth?.wat for life still young, is better we pursue sumthing else like benefit,scare girls dun wan us meh when we graduate.there still time,my mum always rite n still feeling is gone away.i noe i juz saying still...pretend?tat bez option for me anyway rather show her.She think me as bro.....ok why not juz fren.....love is irony.Mine is not love but sick mind....i feel apart from u.U try ignore.i dunnoe wat they told u...we juz frens.

George Michael-Praying for that time.

2007-12-28T09:27:00.000-08:00

I really like this song.Quite meaningful.I hope new year resolution tat children will not had to suffer anymore.

Ideas some r crap but logic in a way.

2007-12-28T06:35:00.000-08:00

Wao, kim ask me to look through an article about divorces will cause environmental damage.It kinda true in sense tat ppl will buy house ,consume more n taking more space.Wao, at first i thought its crap.Come to think of it, from economic point of view
n so called environmental stuff.It logic.here the article hope u understand.
Here the link:

Guess what.I disagree wat Kim say about terrorism is not cause by poverty.But isn't tat obvious. When poverty ppl tend to blame things n other ppl, try to seek refuge in religion.So they slowly get corrupted by the radicals.Uneducated worsen the system but still some terrorist r highly educated eg.some r docs, engineers.Milton Friedman, author of the world is flat conclude tat Islam is a religion not about openess.In the globalized world open minded is important.Ppl tend to be follow not think outside the box.Haih..some many brilliant young muslims join terrorism coz they r unhappy wat the west did( actually the west is colonialism they hate), the country is not develop.Rulers may take advantage of ppl n cause them like tat.
Here an article:

It kinda sad tat Pakistan former PM get assassinated. quite sad actually, she symbolized hope n dream of democratic Pakistan.....freedom of the ppl tat had been oppressed by musharaf regime. Juz shattered like tat.Haih...it seem Musharaf is a smart person.Wat to do politics is like roaring seas...u have to be the toughtest to survive it worst storm.Her death cause some economics turmoil.Asia n euro stock fell but Us stock rebounded.US may have been involve who noes. Oil n gold rise their price.Wat shit is this.A politic turmoil can cause chaos in everything.Bhutto is she a good leader hard to say. She n her husband had been charge of corruption.Maybe n still surprisingly she graduate from ocford n her dad ask her to take lead by age of 20 sumthing i guess.

I seeing nth but onli u in my dream.Still

2007-12-23T04:05:00.000-08:00

Hello again.
I met u again.
I hope it like last time again.
Sipping coffee n killing time.
How yours life?Its been awhile.
God i so missing your smile all the while.
Juz tat i cant bear to see u mature.
Seeing u grown up, make me happier.
Still i wonder i can see u again,
will i see ur lips n hear ur voice.
If u leaving,i understand.
If u don't , give me an answer.
This so called love, its eating me from the inside.
Do u know tat i on my last breath?
Dying on my deathbed without knowing u wat u think of me.
Love is like a cancer, growing unstoppable.
Its so pain, i on the edge.
I glad seeing u happy as always.
It make me feel jealous coz i not there.
Goodbye if u leaving.

I still like u but tat sucks.Guess,I have to be patience.

2007-12-20T05:45:00.000-08:00

Wao,i haven't seen u for an half of year.I guess I am too excited.well tat my weakness.U more mature n independent.More shockingly u read the world is flat.U so interesting.We have same taste except for ur favourite colour orange while i love dark colours for instance purple n black.Why i am talking crap?Something in my body wan to kiss ur red lips.Still i holding back....why i thinking of kissing u.I juz met u yesterday.Now i missing ur smile already.I am stupid tat obsessing u.Well i noe hk is not ur type of guy so am i.Ur type of guy obviously 10 times better than me.I heard u going Sydney..haih Sydney,cooperate law...well not bad field...i dunnoe wat to say.I still like u so much.I tend to leve the past behind still it coming back.i sick of it.Well ur beautiful lips..i love it.

Of those rose petals i saw,i still speechless towards you.

2007-12-14T04:45:00.000-08:00

I feel without sumthing important in my life.So fast one years had passed,i feel i juz passed each day without concern anyhing or make sumhing meaningful.Haih one year,so fast she back.Still there ashes inside me left.Wat i care about her?None really...time does fly by.i remember when young always travel, have someone to look after or etc,childish me....feel now is different.....feel empty..i still lost finding myself.Dunnoe wat to do,apply where to sudy?financial n economics n stats degree?well maybe?ANU?maybestill..haih..exam coming this jan,i better stop blogging now.

"The World is Flat" n flatter each minute

2007-12-05T22:32:00.000-08:00

Well,perhaps some of u have heard of this book " The world is flat" by Thomas Friedman.It very good book to understand the market n globalize.One thing i dun understand if malaysian understand tat world is flatter each passing moment n beside globalization change evrything now.Internet n comp,pc ,telecomunication may contribute to tat.I still dun understand why some malaysians dun agree wit me tat IT/computer field ppl r better paid thann u r as doc n etc.Dun be so typical...well tat so many jobs beside docs lawyers n sumthing else.optic engineering it interest me a lot which can save our children future.We no longer can depend buring coal,petroleum n etc for producing energy especially in china.like my uncle david said too,"the world is change,henry..IT n engineering will be valued."he recomemnd me to take computer studies in computer engineering rather than computer business, one more thing if u will fail coz u had give up."he kinda rite,his step bro as a baker have a big house, few sport cars( i wish he give me one for free).i dun he highly educated,well i think he is hardworking n streetsmart.Coz give u r smart dun necessary u will succeed.In the future,if some dude juz come up to me n said" i am doc,pls respect..i can afford a beamer aka bmw z4, i am high class,my job is a doc but my purpose is too earn or work as some doc in the hospital get well paid" give me i dun give a damn,i tell u wat i think.which rock u live under for so long? So wat u r doc, wat u have done.discover new theories n drugs or vaccine for children in africa.i dun think u doing tat but u r doing some job in hospital for the rich ppl.wat shit is tat.thought doc onli well paid.how bout investment banker, economists, finanical mathematician n so on.they earn more than u.i dun noe wat crack up mentaly malaysian have here.why not u guys prove sumthinng?Local uni well they say wat excuse i dunnoe wat n say they filed so many research,i was like ok tat quantity not quality.u did improve but others improve a lot.local uni give me local grad n lec got sum kind of ego.i dunnoe la.i see some local grad r like tat.maybe i shoudl not say so soon or comemnt ppl like tat.still local uni i still dun get it why giving excuse.true to say UM shouldn't drop so much.medicine there is not bad n so wit humanities.wao one thing i discover these few days.there is so many jobs i cant think it off.i like to listen to ppl wit ideas, their entrepreunship,creative,innovative n smart ideas.i dun like when i ask ppl wat ur job or wat u do.i do e=mc2.i will think ok u r boring.but to ppl said i thinking the theory of black hole.wao this is interesting.i admire eddie,he din get good result in spm addmaths..u guys will think why he take further maths.but he did well for the test.u noe why..see how he thinks, he an artistic person i think he like to think otherwise as we speak out of the box.coz i believe malaysia edu systerm love nerds who memorize ( but i dun mean all nerds) due to tat we lost a lot of brains.too discriminate our youths brain who thinks but cant memorize.a lvls the brits give us the simple ones n ask us to think for ourselves well it kinda true.tat y i cant do physic.but one thing raeven said today at lunch is true." When u r rich, u have a lot of oppurnities n chances, but when u r poor u need a lot of hardwork.XComputer n tech stuff control the work.tat y jj's bro is rite.my dad still belive comp is not good business,i still dun noe why he say tat or maybe he concern bout me.dey i am a chinese understand chinesed culture,i have the internet n if i have computer skills,well tat different, thing change coz its the globalize world.i remember this gusy always ask me not to learn business, i was like wat u trying to say.who said i going to learn business.dun talk cock.beside it the globalize world if malaysia didn't have oppurnity for me ,why should i work here?dun be so typical.e confidence wit urself n coz swim or sink.electircal engineering earn a lot money by time u go out too late la.i think maybe optic engineering or nano.like mr jahn cheah always do ur job wit passion n u will succeed in it.see ppl ,i also dars wan to work mnc n bcome a businesswoman, i believe she will succeed in it.i tell u one thing wit science degree we also can do business n jzu science offer u a secured job.business is a risk, bsuiness is about openess.i tell u wat dun think money but think ur interest.thopmas friedman is rite,why should i give jobs to malaysian engineers who r duplicated by computer n books,i should sent the works to india or china.one thing china lack from india is english.oil prices will still goes down.if bush invade iran,he will made a stupid mistake.coz of his admin,usa may go under recession may cause recession in around the world.usa fed may cut interest rate tat means the former blockhead go there cheap la butinflation.nvm tat i talking crap but econs.shit i did a simple mistake in econ test.sure get B..why i put decrease ?

Oh juz shoot me

2007-11-29T19:39:00.000-08:00

Today i get my physic paper.well its bad....shit i really had to work up on it,the problem is i cant understand physic.econs n maths still interest coz like also can.physic maybe is the lecturer.he so soft spoken,unconfident,boring n etc.he make the class sucks.well i cant blame him i shuld work hard.i thinking of dropping it next sem.by the way my course dun need physics.i planning to take finance,econs n stats for degree.stats interest me tat we can use stats to forecast the markets, stocks n etc in business.tat quite interesting.i dun noe there is a job abput financial mathematics.these guys r called quants, they r high paid ass kids n sit down shake leg.they juz need to design a model or software to forecast the market n get paid for tat.wao the world have so many jobs i cant think of.i sumtimes i dun understand ppl mentality...muz bcome docs,lawyers n engineers.well tat so many jobs.juz tat they r high paid tat we muz work as tat.not reall depend ur interest really.listen to ur self n be ur self.so many fucking good job u nvr heard of.i think mentality in malaysia neeeded more exposure. in malaysia i dun hear anybody ppl working as investment banker,good paid n high bonus.tat wat job i going to thought myt father against it.i heard well goldman sachs may coming to malaysia.well maybe this is my chances.i maybe juz crapping here.oh shoot my aunt ask me where i going uk,sg or aus.grandpa say aussia,parents say sg,aunt thinking uk.uk la is better got seng n yy.still expansive but relatively cheaper than aussie uni.i thinking to admin to ucl n lse.still wit this result i dunnoe.maths i kinda ok n econs too.but physic its stupid.should have taken accounting rather than physics.my aunt from aus ask me to study in india...coz its cheaper n i will be staying wit her overthere got maid n drivers n all.still india huh nah, see first i thniking to apply next year sep for uk uni.if aus,i thinking of anu,mel uni n monaash.i in a dilemma,not sure where to go or wat to do.oh juz shoot me.....tat girl in mid valley still making me so hot n i feel like falling.she the bomb n fit to be my dream girl.still i can't her name thought...she juz got me lovestoned.

Protest " Bersih"

2007-11-13T00:13:00.000-08:00

Hmm.... this happen on 10th Nov saturday...well my friends thought its digi campaign from the monorail, but it not quite except from the yellow shirt.it protest called bersih lead by ngo n five opposition party n for more info search in wikipedia.

interview of anwar by al jazeera

this our info minister buat malu to whole country.last time idea of malay model now this stupid grammar eng pula.

THES-QS Ranking

2007-11-12T21:02:00.000-08:00

Oh well the new result for world ranking is out......it seem Malaysia Unis din make it in the 200.Cant be malaysia uni tat sucks?

UKM and UM vice-chancellors attributed their fall to the new methodology used to calculate rankings this year."Even the National University of Singapore (NUS) has dropped to the 33rd spot when it was always within the top 10," Universiti Malaya vice-chancellor Datuk Rafiah Salim said."The way I look at it, smaller countries like Malaysia are bound to lose out as THES has introduced new criteria which is peer review and has changed the citation and list of publications."Rafiah said with morethan 3,000 universities getting ranked by THES annually, Malaysianuniversities had to improve if they wanted to remain on top of the list."Ifwe want to compete with some of the top universities in the world, first wehave to be in the same league. "Right now, we are not. One way to overcomethat is through adequate funding."She said NUS received an annual funding ofS$1.2 billion (RM2.7 billion) a year compared to UM's RM400 million annualbudget.

Isn't tat an excuse?dun compare ur self wit others..obviously u guys need seriously to be improvished "A Lot".Budget funds oh well pls ask government who wan us to be cemerlang gemilang in 2020.Isnt tat investment in education is the better way then rather waste on stupid prjects tat got nth do wit the society.Investment in human capital isn't tat essential in economic development.Government say wat malaysian prefer good paid rather then serve the country.stupid excuse , i think i bit too far.Ppl from other countries willing to pay high salary for great brains to work wit them....tat logic.

Well quite shocking actually lse drop from 17 to 59.Lse it cant be ,it too dramatic fall....well ucl at number 9.thinking uk or aus after A lvls.Mummy say see result...oh crude.Here the link for the world ranking Thes-qs.

It figures....still

2007-11-08T21:28:00.000-08:00

Last nite i dreamt about her again.u noe how much i hate tat kind of dream.make me sad n relucant to go to school.oh dear Mr Lawrence tell me tat malaysia edu is sucks.come to think of it it sucks.STPM third hardest in the world still the question not revelant to world.Well i mean art stream for form 6 not science.science i think same with a lvls.Degree even worse more to memory n theory more.wat shit is this.i not going to hire some engineer tat how u do tat by telling me tat e=mc2 all that shits.I dun understand why government trying to do...brainwashing us to use more left brain...a nerdy society...hmmm...maybe....come on how other country improve so fast.coz u noe why?coz is investment in edu systerm.like in america,u think u straight As student n academic smart can get into havard.They laugh at u man.they not going to choose academic.they choose straight As but streetsmart,out spoken,eloquent,confident, gave good knowledge,creative n high self esteemed.U wonder america is land of oppurnity.of course! their edu systerm promote creative thinking.form 6 have stressing a lot of my friends.come on la we juz kids n not much of memory power like computers 120gb or so on.after learning economics,it not a question tat scholarship shuld be given to poor student.scholarship shuld be use to encourage great minds n world leaders n titans.as a investment to future of our country.......dun tell me crap about its unfair of course unfair.we send ppl to uk to study not someppl who have doubts about themselves of course we will choose ppl have great qualities.Form 6 frens,i believe u all can do it.Dun have doubts about urself...world is unfair tat onli the begining.....be confidence about urself n ambitious.All things can be achieve wit dreams.Well me...i have to work hard to get job in wall street.i dream to go new york one day aka the big apple.Well friends u wan to be engineer,some of the world best engineer r not good in calculus still they have great qualities n attidude.Read "the wolrd is flat"U will get wat i meant.

Mr Jahn Cheah.

2007-10-30T01:31:00.000-07:00

Well he is a very interesting n funny person.His hobbits is like to tell craps n grandfather stories.sumtimes very lanxi still a ok guy.He is my fm lecturer.He like zq but in lanxi n very confident version.his favourite phrase is do ur question til the cows come home.like to use phrases in class n high iq jokesi dunnoe its problem wit iq or the language communication problem among students.Surpirisngly he from a lor star n same school wit my cousin kolej sultan abdul hamid.he keep telling us tat he train air stewardess when his young.guide them n watching them swimming.I dun like the way he teach c3 n c4 too fast n fp1 i getting familiar wit his style.too much thinking i got a bit of white hair d.well nth to talk about him.well i thinking to drop physics too hard for me or the lecturer sucks.he likes talking to himself or to board.lack of confidence n soft skills.the physic lecturer i feel suffer under him,i prefer the form 6 teacher pn teoh.sob..sob.well why ppl asking why i take fm actually if i taking financial studies.well i going to take financial,economics n statitics.i consider financial as major.well i noe i bit sacractic in saying this still some ppl juz like to kill b4 interrgeration.

lame joke

2007-10-30T01:18:00.000-07:00

U noe one day a priest lost his rooster.

so, on the sunday mass, he ask his fellow chirstian in church.

he said" Anyone have a cock?"

then all men rise.

then he said "sorry,wrong question...have anybody seen a cock?"

then all women rise.

then the priest say" sorry again wrong question,but have anyone seen my cock?"

all nun rise.

Hmmmmm..

2007-10-29T21:28:00.000-07:00

When i read kim blog, i feel tat i such an ass.When i in primary these tow kids.n these two kids nvr continue their second year in the same school.When i in standard 5,i dunnoe wat this guy name.i forgot liao. i remember we always bully him except seng,chong yuet n rest of good guys.i feel awkward n regret of my action.he din have frens coz he is weird.i remember to an ant.well he dress like totally nerdy.nerds the bunch i always feel strange.the definition of a nerd well is always tug in their shirt,wearing dorky glasses, always talk about computers & hot chicks(as if they will get one still they will get in the end),showing off their knowledges n talk lanxily.a good example of tat is well the pilot.but 10% in him is a loser.back to the story,i remember i always bully n be mean to him.look of it i kinda immature the way i act.i should make fren wit him at least.still....haih,ah seng told me tat my action still wrong after all this years.haih....i so fucking immature n childish.i should grow up.this year two years is important A lvls.My parent give me some high hope.well in the faimly boys will be boys.U can say tat i am the black sheep of the family.ya ernest i remember in maria ooi i always be mean to him too.still he always sit alone.he kinda introvet person.dun talk much.ah seng wasn't happy wit him.i always elike talk rudely to him n be mean.why?i dunnoe,i feel superior over him.well tat bad.i noe iam snobish,lanxi,act cool oh wat n etc of bad stuff,tat wat all they said.still i feel tat ppl dun understand me.i have still long way to go.

Subang

2007-10-25T21:34:00.000-07:00

Going to subang to day to eat bak ku teh.Everyday in my aunt house,i really miss pork.now i noe how blackie feel.Why i back to love topic again?chiam today too hyperactive.shit i feel retard i need to feed on games.i hope my mum agreee on buying a new laptop for me.

Haih....

2007-10-25T21:23:00.000-07:00

I just found out tat this girl in my class look like her or i am mentally retarded again.seem i too obessed wit her thoight oh well i hope i forget fish soom.this girl in my class i like to make her mad coz i like to see her angry.sound sick isn't it.i noe i am a sick bastard....haih i got few hair liao.it seem fm take it toll on me.by the time i graduate i will be white apek wit funny looking retard face.i feel sad to an orphanage in my aunt tmn.rumour had it tat the orpanhage will be forced to moved due to image.sad those kids have no place to stay.i wonder where all the money or ppl do concern about them.they r human too.the world is cruel.ppl always neglect the poor n needy.juz tat ppl....sigh....we always judge book by it cover n wat they done not who they truly r.

Haih...i dunnoe la i feel sad... sumtimes ... oh .. weird me

2007-10-22T01:34:00.000-07:00

I still like her thought but each day getting lesser.At last got some improvement thought. Raya week let me felt tat i juz realized tat how small the world i live in.i turn around there beautiful girls everywhere.hey she not the onli one.i feel in love again but this time wit this girl from college.i think she is in diploma same as hmmm 's girl.still i feel tat i kinda useless i still young.Juz get lecture from grandpa yesterday well amost everyday get lecture.seem, i have so many flaw.Well the girl of my dream i saw her at mid valley last few days ago.Wao she fit my description of my dream girl.Tall,tanned skin,sexy in a way,eloquent,complicated,long hair nice face.......i so picky is n't it...well wit this attidude i will not get anyone.aiya i forget to get her name.well it made me realize wat a fool am i to fall for fish.

Bull shit

2007-10-22T01:00:00.000-07:00

Congratulations , you are...

minishorts of minishorts.net

You are outgoing, direct, smart, pretty, and a definite go-getter. You are frank, a little too frank perhaps that sometimes you get on people's nerves and make them very upset. If people attack you, you hit back with triple the force without blinking because you are the kind of person who knows exactly what you are talking about or else you wouldn't talk about it. Your quick-thinking is what makes you special. You are an elitist.

Which Malaysian Blogger Are You?

Shit day.

2007-10-10T02:28:00.000-07:00

Today i feel tired....still i have go to college.I expect Mr jahn cheah to tease i and dq in class coz of yesterday. i and dq was talking bad a bout him in the toilet dg was doing his business while i was talking how he teach.i say fp1 at least he teach seriously n c4 is kinda simply.I really dun understand.Rest all bad stuff bout him then we stop talking bout him.suddenly got flushed in the toilet it was mr jahn cheah n then he give a hmmm n then go off.I told dg n we were laughing wat a million chance to meet him in toilt.actually i hope he dun understand mandarin n beside i thought he at lvl 2 toilet lol.wat a joke.

My Music

2007-10-10T02:21:00.001-07:00

Sorry Still under construction

2007-09-10T03:27:00.000-07:00

Still haven't finish wit my blog yet.Pls clcik my AD thanks you.